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Who doesn’t love bacon?  Crumbled atop a salad, wrapped around a filet mignon, or even resting next to some scrambled eggs, this versatile meat is sure to please anyone and everyone (unless they’re a vegetarian, in which case…they will never know the heavenly joys of this magical meat—no worries, MORE FOR ME!).

Bacon is beloved by many an American, and recently there has been a lot of attention given to this fact as more and more companies are producing bacon-related products to appeal to this long-standing love affair. While there are bacon candies, bacon milkshakes, and even bacon bandages and clothing, the tried and true strips of pork belly sometimes get overlooked in favor of the novelty of these new creations that parody the product.

Bacon even makes a fantastic magic carpet!

Bacon even makes a fantastic magic carpet!

In honor of the candy of all meats, the crowning glory of the pork world, the crispy, beautiful, tempting wonder that is bacon, I shall share with you a recipe for candied bacon…and also one for bacon-wrapped asparagus…for those vegetarians that just can’t take it any more. I tried to feel bad about my love affair with bacon once.  Luckily, I came to my senses and bacon and I have been living happily ever after ever since.  I was going to post a picture of a piglet with the words “Bacon Seed” underneath it…but I refuse to believe that cute little piglets grow into bacon.  Denial, perhaps…but it’s the most delicious denial EVER.

This makes me tearful and aroused all at the same time…roll that beautiful bacon footage!)

This makes me tearful and aroused all at the same time…roll that beautiful bacon footage!

Candied Bacon

12 strips of bacon

Sprinkle of black pepper

1/3-1/2 c brown sugar

  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Line a rimmed baking sheet with foil and set a rack on top (such as a cookie cooling rack). Spray the rack with nonstick spray.
  2. Place all ingredients in a bowl. Using your hands (always the preferred method for any cooking…it’s just more FUN), mix around the strips into the sugar and pepper until well coated, then place the coated bacon strips on the rack.
  3. Bake 15 to 20 minutes, or until the bacon looks caramelized and crispy. Watch closely after 15 minutes since the sugar can begin to burn when left in too long—and burning bacon is a grave, cardinal sin.  Serve immediately.

 

Looks like asparagus just slipped into something a little more sexy…

Looks like asparagus just slipped into something a little more sexy…

Bacon-Wrapped Asparagus (serves 6)

1 lb asparagus, woody ends trimmed off

10 slices bacon, cut in half

Drizzle of olive oil and balsamic vinegar

Sprinkle of black pepper

  1. Preheat oven to 400F. Wrap one half-slice of bacon tightly around each piece of asparagus and place on a baking sheet covered in aluminum foil.
  2. Drizzle the balsamic vinegar and olive oil over the asparagus and sprinkle with black pepper to taste. Roll around the asparagus a bit to coat evenly.
  3. Bake for 15 minutes, then flip each asparagus over and bake for another 10-15 minutes or until the bacon is crispy, then serve.

And there you go! You got your sweet, you got your savory…but most importantly, you got your BACON.  Now get out there, and spread the bacon gospel throughout the world!

...and now for something completely different: Kevin Bacon, out of bacon.

…and now for something completely different: Kevin Bacon, out of bacon.

 

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